Ivy's Reflections

The gathering sure was a great way for us, families to rekindle our closeness and love towards each other, like Cat said (quoting Jerry) we should be willing to enter deeply into the life of another, which means allowing our lives to be changed, which means the person who is experiencing pain/loss must also be willing to receive the help and the friendship.

We are happy and excited to gather with the whole family. It seems like an eternity since we last saw each other and catch up with each other. I am glad to see everyone. This meeting is especially meaningful for us, because this is my first time visiting mother since the accident. I wasn't able to attend her memorial service and I felt really left out because I didn't get to see the pictures or videos.

A few things that I can recall about Mother. I miss Mother's laughter and the excitement that she showed when she played mahjong with Leo & I at Clementi. We used to drink tea or drink red wine, talking away about the old times, and we are always amazed that she is able to talk away and at the same time, draws herself back to the game. She's always winning and after she won, she will go to the market and buy groceries the next morning. I guess that's her way of telling us that she appreciates us spending time playing mahjong with her. At the market, she told me "Hmm..I need to get this pork rib for Cat and Jenni. Their market doesn't sell as fresh as what is available in Clementi. Ah.. you know, even Big is so used to do her marketing in Clementi market".

I think, being the newest member of the daughter-in-law, I spent the least time with her. However, I am able to look back and recapture the memorable time that we spent together. On some afternoon, we would spend time sitting down and Mother will tell me all her childhood stories of how she had to take care of her elder brother and how hard life was back then during the Japanese Occupation. Sometimes, we cried together.

Mother brought me to a few places: just me and her. I remember she brought me to St. Andrew's Cathedral and we had fun. We sing Mandarin worship songs, she sang and dance beautifully beside me. I was enjoying myself with her. Then we took a bus ride home.

We enjoyed going to the market, buying groceries. She can plan her menu very well despite her old age. She knows very well what she wants and what to get. She's also very thrifty and gave me a lot of advice which I will cherish for the rest of my life.

When she came over to KL, I remember I was new with the KL road, I didn't know how to drive to a LRT station, I was depending on a GPS. Leo was busy, so I tried my best to drive to the nearest LRT station even though we got lost a few times (o.O)'. To me, what mattered most was, she didn't pressure me or anything, she was very calm and just kept quiet when I needed to concentrate on the road. She trusted me to get her to her destination. Finally, we arrived at the station after like 40 minutes. I guess she must have been so relieved because she was rushing to attend her cell group the next day, Friday.

Cat, just want to say thanks for your effort, being our DOG. I will always try my best for our family even though we all know the journey is not a bed of roses. We do get scratched by the thorns occasionally but that's what makes us bind closer together in the face of adversities.